Looking back on this wet and windy week, Dad has got significantly worse in his dementia journey. He is still happy and a lovely Daddy to go and chill with.

On Monday I picked dad up from his respite care today. This gave poor Mum time to sort out washing before her lovely little shadow came back. We are not allowed in to the respite centre due to covid. I peered through the window to see what he was up to. He was in a chair with his back to the window which meant he couldn't see me, but I could clearly see his picture bingo card. The fabulous activities lady was carefully going round the group making sure each participate crossed of the right picture in the bingo game. Dad however, was happily drawing round each and every picture and completely ignoring the prompting. Eventually she gave up, well he is happy enough drawing round and round.

Dad came of the centre a carers hand, he needs to be lead anywhere now. He checked it was me and not Mum a couple of times. Then we had to discuss if we were going to Wirksworth or Winster, since he couldn't remember the names of Wirksworth or even Winster it was a difficult conversation to understand what he was confused about.

On arriving at his home in Winster he was unwilling to empty his pockets. After removing gloves and a hat he stopped rummaged a bit in other pockets making a great show of it too. “Nothing else” he said. Now I knew the care home had given him chocolates. I went into his cardigan pocket.

“Hey that's my pocket”

“Dad what's this in them”

“Oh yes. Its stuff. With a message.”

The care home had added a message to a bag of chocolates.

“Can you read it Dad”

Dad reads

“Happy valentine's day Frank. We all love you very much”

Dad struggled with valentine's. He then said

“Thats nice isn't it. They nice there.”

Thankyou to the respite care. He kept looking at the card and reading it over and over again.

Tuesday is Wirksworth market day. However it was raining hard. Dad peered out of the window, shock his head and settled down back in his chair next to the fire. Since Mum and I were very tired, we decided this was an excellent idea. I came over later that morning.

As it was still raining I used the time to ring various organisations that were suppose to be supporting Dads care. We needed to get Dads payment card so we can pay for his respite. This was to be sorted by last Christmas. I never got through to the person in charge of this. One wrong number given to me and the other kept saying the phone was busy, on answering phone option available.

Another person to call because Mum was supposed to have had a carers assessment that had been referred to the Derbyshire cares association over 3 weeks ago. I rang Derbyshire Cares Association, they knew nothing of this referral that the Mental health team should had made. This was a bit disappointing, who is caring for our carers! I did manage to make the carers assessment appointment. It is a TELEPHONE appointment in March. Not quiet sure how you can do an assessment over the phone, especially when Mum is on the phone Dad gets very anxious and will start to panic, often taking the phone from Mums hands. It will be and interesting assessment.

I also tried to speak to Dads care worker/social worker. I left a message.

The rain eventually stopped and we all wandered up the street to the post box and shop. I love our village. People stop and say hello to Dad. They introduce themselves, even though Dad has lived in Winster for 40 odd years. He might not stop to talk much but he really appreciates it, as do we.

Thankyou very much Winster people.

After our shopping trip Dad and I got logs in and refilled the bird food. This being the most important thing to Dad, except ice creams on sticks, and Mum of course. Mum had to rest her poor back. Its a long way to the shop!

We then had chair yoga via zoom organised by Derbyshire carers association. Well Mum had chair yoga, I had entertain Dad. Dad and I did a bit of yoga breathing. Then a bit of yoga waving arms around. The Dad decided lunch was more important.

Wednesday we tried going to the Blue Lagoon at the stone centre for lunch, but it was busy. I magicked up corn-beef sandwiches instead.

On thursday I think my telephoning had reached someone. We got lots of letters which don't make sense in the post. Its a bit disheartening when they can't even spell Mums name right.

The week ended today with us all surviving the storms so far! We had Sunday lunch together.

Dad had a present from my sister, his younger daughter too. It was a magnet set. Dad had been an armature rewinder for most of his life, he knew a lot about north and south and magnet attraction, how electricity can be made from magnets. Watching him play with these, feel the magnetic pressure but not understand what it was, well it was a bit upsetting. Mum had to have a moment. Dad however was fascinated by them in his own little way.

The dementia journey has its ups and downs. Its always a little surprising. What makes you cry and what makes you smile. Navigating the care system is another story in itself!